Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?

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  (248): sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking? http://tfl.nu/8ucv
  Replies (1) Good night (1680) Bad night (637)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial

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  (480): I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial http://tfl.nu/135m
  Replies (7) Good night (1366) Bad night (975)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.

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  (716): it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis. http://tfl.nu/lwww
  Replies (57) Good night (6137) Bad night (1058)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass

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  (618): The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass http://tfl.nu/wmly
  Replies (412) Good night (26503) Bad night (3683)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"

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  (519): Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake" http://tfl.nu/m7yz
  Replies (12) Good night (3253) Bad night (1593)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl

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  (785): says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl http://tfl.nu/t2ss
  Replies (3) Good night (2140) Bad night (913)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink

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  (406): Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink http://tfl.nu/w6xd
  Replies (5) Good night (1878) Bad night (727)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL

  (310): View more from California

  so no, not her best night

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  (310): She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL (310): so no, not her best night http://tfl.nu/htxy
  Replies (6) Good night (766) Bad night (1992)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.

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  (718): Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up. http://tfl.nu/gzqi
  Replies (4) Good night (1379) Bad night (533)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game

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  (512): He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game http://tfl.nu/mfd2
  Replies (13) Good night (1955) Bad night (469)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.

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  (720): Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me. http://tfl.nu/g5ss
  Replies (3) Good night (671) Bad night (442)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up 

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  (865): I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up  http://tfl.nu/ojbn
  Replies (3) Good night (855) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.

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  (402): Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop. http://tfl.nu/dwia
  Replies (2) Good night (501) Bad night (271)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.

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  (305): I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle. http://tfl.nu/tqe0
  Replies (6) Good night (732) Bad night (305)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low

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  (802): I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low http://tfl.nu/lnwt
  Replies (2) Good night (430) Bad night (328)

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