I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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