You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
