She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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