Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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