Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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