hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
