There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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