its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize
