I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
