Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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