Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
