You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
