She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
