You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Randomize