The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
