i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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