this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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