Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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