It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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