Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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