she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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