I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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