i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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