she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Randomize
