That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?