Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
home. puking in laundry basket.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I AM VODKA MAN
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
