this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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