Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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