You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
