i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
The convent might be a nice break from real life
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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