The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
