they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Randomize
