whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
