im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
