drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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