So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
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I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
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U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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