Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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