well I can't set my house on fire every night
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize