You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I'm jealous of your bromance
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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