ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize