Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Sex in the backyard? Check.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
