dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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