can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
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We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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