$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
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she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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