How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
