I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
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Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
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Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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