You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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