East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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