i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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