i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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