the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize